They could at least call it the "I'm gonna rape you" Bill

“The Department of Education seeks to restrict access to our programs by redefining the idea of what constitutes Gainful Employment in a recognized occupation for purposes of Title IV student loan eligibility. This new regulation would treat career college students as separate and inherently unequal. In addition, the newly proposed regulation draft would limit access to programs for over 300,000 students like us and curtail postsecondary training for students in high growth employment fields including health care. In difficult economic times, President Obama has asked America to have the most postsecondary graduates of any nation in the world by 2020. The rule proposed by the Department of Education is at odds with this goal.”
-Studentsforacademicchoice.org

Interesting how the Health Care Reform Bill could have anything to do with student loans and the education of our country. This fact alone should make people cautious of what exactly this bill contains. If you have to sneak this into something entirely different and just hope people don’t really read it, then maybe you are doing something you wouldn’t want your mom to find out about.

This is completely ridiculous and it makes me wonder sometimes how far out there the terrorists are. Ok, maybe I don’t exactly agree that everyone in America should die. Sorry terrorists, but I do wholeheartedly agree with the fact that this country does need a pretty deep cleansing which I don’t see happening anytime soon. We’ll get to that another time…

Here is what is happening, in a nutshell. The Dept. of Education no runs Sallie Mae, who handled a good majority of people’s student loans. Result: thousands of Sallie Mae employees are going to be collecting unemployment and, the government now controls the primary source of loans for most people trying to go to school. Let’s be honest here, college tuition is ridiculous. No, it is beyond ridiculous, and the costs keep rising above the rate of inflation. People who can afford to pay for tuition up front is diminishing rapidly.

Cool, so now a group of individuals, who do not give two shits about us, are in charge of whether or not we will get the support available to make a better future. Nothing to worry about right? Ha. There is talk out now that they will withhold funding of students loans to private institutions, i.e. ITT-Tech University of Phoenix, etc. You can still go to a public school and get a hit-or-miss education, depending on who you are (If you have the drive and motivation to reach further and learn for yourself, then public education will be fine. If you prefer to do whatever is required to pass a class with a C and do nothing more, you are fucked. Thanks for playing).

Let’s talk about the numbers:

University of Phoenix has 391,145 total students.
ITT-Tech has approximately 70,000 students.

The economic impact of Private Colleges:

- Had estimated revenues of $134 billion in 2004.
- As these dollars work their way through local economies, their effect is multiplied into a cumulative economic impact of $335 billion.
- Employs 750,000 people nationwide.
How many private colleges are out there?
- There are 1,600 private, nonprofit institutions nationwide. Half of the nonprofit colleges and universities in the United States are private. They enroll 3.4 million students.

So tell me where the downside of people going to a private college is? Please, because I don’t see it. I understand that the government would love to just give loans to people going to their schools, but the government is full of assholes.

Looking at a worst case scenario here we see the government cutting all funding for student loans going to private colleges. After that happens students at those schools have two options: start paying to finish their degree out of pocket or through other means (second mortgage), or, they can transfer to a public school and get their student loans there. The downside of the latter option is most credits from private do not transfer to public.


“Sorry students, time to start over. Oh, and you still owe us all the money for the time spent at the private college I more or less forced you out of. Go fuck yourself, sincerely, the government.”


The above statement is a sample apology letter from our government after this happens.
Alright so that is the students, but what about the colleges themselves and their estimated 750,000 employees. Off the top of my head I can think of a couple scenarios that are not too farfetched. One, the colleges will begin with massive budget cuts and layoffs (further damning the education of our children). This is if the businesses can stay afloat anyway, I imagine most would not be able to survive very long since most of their clientele now has no choice but to go to the other guy. Another thing that could inevitably happen is the sinking colleges could raise their tuition exponentially, which would just tighten the noose around their necks even further.

Sounds like a lose-lose situation to me. But what do I know; I am not a limp-dicked politician that is indirectly stealing the food from my children’s mouth. You shouldn’t listen to me; listen to those assholes when they feed you lines about how this is going to help people.

If there was a bill that passed that made it so you could only get a car loan for a Chevy and you had to pay cash for a Ford do you think there is any chance in hell that that would pass? What is the difference in what we’re talking about with the student loans? Nothing.

Websites where I got my numbers:
Collegesearch.collegeboard.com – Search UOP.
ITT-Tech.edu
NAICU.com